Wednesday, October 20, 2010


I have been having a hard time existing lately.. It sucks to get up, it sucks to move, it sucks to breathe.. I'm tired, and the only thing keeping me going is my boys.. And honestly, that's barely...

I know I am in control of my own decisions, and need to own up to my responsibilities and wear the consequences of my action, but every once in a while, I throw myself a pity party.. And it seems I'm due one pretty soon.

I had a pretty good support group when I lived in Virginia, but since moving here in July it's been so lonely. No friends, no family, no fun. I only pray for strength, understanding, compassion, and a winning lottery ticket won't hurt....


  1. Ugh. You having one of those *months* too, huh? I feel ya on the no friends, no family thing. I thought had friends, apparenty not. My boys are my saving grace these days, they are the reason I get out of bed.

    Keep going, hopefully it'll get better!!

  2. New follower here from an old blog hop. Your title is actually why I found you...very interesting.

    I Imagine when I wandered this way and read how tough it is right now on you I decided I should read some of your posts and maybe get to know a little bout your demented chaos before I commented. So, Ive read now every post you have written from Feb. 2009 thru today. Thank the God/dess you haven't been a crazed blogger like me and it didn't take long to get thru them.

    I don't feel like I know you any better now than I did, just more confused. Which is not a hard thing for me to be...just saying.

    I do know what it feels like to feel the way you do right now. I wont give you any advice because, I have not walked in your shoes. But I have battled depression, anxiety, 5 children, an ungrateful husband, and crazy ass swapping parents who have been abducted by aliens. I swear those people are not the same two people who raised me. LOL~

    I'm not going to assume anything but by reading your posts I would just figure you are a military wife with a set of twins. I'm not sure however if they are boys or girls or do you have two sets....see, I'm all confused now and I really hate being confused. It makes me feel crazy.

    I hope you haven't had any complications with your surgery--as I know a very gentile lady who had it done and has not been the same health wise since.

    Blessings to you Alyz and may you find some peace and comfort in knowing that you are not alone.

    P.S. and No, I'm not a stalker, just a blog junkie with a mad addiction right now. You can find my blog at


And your Diagnosis is?